On A Personal Note...

So, I've been thinking. And I've been challenged. A few more people read my blog now on a regular basis than when I first started, so I get a few more comments. I knew that my posts would spark a dialogue, and in some cases a passionate one. I have been very surprised at the civility with which people comment. I am happy for that. That's probably because most people (except maybe 2 or 3) who read this blog are relatively close to me, or at the least know me, and therefore don't want to be rude. I would imagine that if a whole lot of people (random people) got a hold of this thing, then the comments would be astonishingly heated. Anyway, I digress.
I feel like I have been enlightened a bit lately. By God. Through others. None of the questions I have posted on this blog have been answered. I still believe or don't believe or don't know if I believe the controversial things I've discussed. I want to say that. I HAVE NOT SETTLED DOWN IN MY THEOLOGY.
However, talking to several people over the past few weeks. People who care about me, and whom I care about. Talking to these people has been sort of convicting. Not in a condemning..."Ok, fine, I'll just go with the flow" kind of conviction. But a "what is inside of my heart" conviction. Again, I will state again, what I am saying now DOES NOT mean that I am going to be any tamer, or less controversial, or riot inciting...what I am saying is something personal.
It can be summed up in the way I said it when I was talking to my friend Curt at Borders over a cup of Caramel Latte. We were talking about Copernicus Theory and essentially he has been wondering some of the same things I have been. Not about Copernicus, but about the changes our faith is undertaking and if there are good and bad, and will they eventually be accepted as our faith etc... Well...I said this (well not exactly but this is a clear summation of what I probably stumbled through in real life):
"The thing that's been bothering me is how we always revert back to the box. The old way. It's like me right now. You know, I can complain and try to change the way we do things. I can see things I don't think are right, so I question them. Take them apart. Like biblical interpretaion. Like our church structure. Like legalism. Like the woes of insitutionalized religion. On and on. I can say that all of these things keep us from what we really should be about...caring, loving, being, worshipping, feeding, clothing, etc... I can rant about how we need to get back to these things. I spend so much of my time talking about this stuff. Ranting. Stirring. Rocking the boat. Pissing people off... Philosophizing... Pointing out people who I disagree with (Shout out to Patsy and Fal-wiz-ell!)... And I can end up spending so much time questioning it all and criticizing, and TALKING about CHANGE, that I don't have time to BE the CHANGE. And that in the end, we end up still just talking about stuff and not doing. And that is no different than the people before us who failed to act, it's just that WE use more philosophy, reason, and less church-speak, when THEY used theology, tradition, and church-speak. But all these things paralyze us from action. Or at least they have the potential to do so."
Well, I'm gonna be honest with you, I went on a little long. Meaning, I didn't say all that to Curt. The gist of what I said is in there, but I just kept going.
The bottom line is, I like questioning. I think it is important. Questioning the way things are is how revolutions start. It's how the great reformations started. It's how countries are founded. And not questioning is how things are destroyed. Countries dry up, churches die, businesses become ineffective for lack of questioning. It is IMPERATIVE that we continually question things. When I stop questioning and stirring the waters and rocking MY boat is the day I die.
However, what I am talking about is more personal than what I write in a stupid blog, or what I say. It's what I do. Here are some personal facts:

1) HOW OFTEN I TALK ABOUT SERVING THE POOR= all the time
HOW OFTEN I ACTUALLY SERVE THE POOR =almost never
*other than (VERY) occasionally getting them something to eat or
dropping a buck or two or acknowledging them, I do nothing!!!!

2) HOW OFTEN I TALK ABOUT ACKNOWLEDGING PEOPLE= all the time
HOW OFTEN I STOP AND TALK TO PEOPLE (AT CHURCH)= maybe 1 in6 people
" " (OUTSIDE CHURCH)=maybe 1 in 20 or so

3) HOW OFTEN I TALK ABOUT GETTING TO THE HEART OF TRUE PRAYER
AND WORSHIP WITHOUT PRETENSE = it's a pet peeve of mine...all the time!
HOW MUCH TIME DO I SPEND LATELY IN (FOCUSED) PRAYER IN A SINGLE DAY?
=maybe 5 minutes

4) HOW MUCH DO I TALK ABOUT WHAT IS TRULY BIBLICAL -VS- WHAT IS
TRADITION OR LEGALISM = a lot, and with a degree of arrogance
HOW MUCH TIME HAVE I ACTUALLY SPENT IN PERSONAL STUDY OF GOD'S
WORD THIS WEEK =10-15 minutes
*I do read a lot of other books though, but it's ironic how I have reverted back to reading and accepting another persons interpretation of the scripture without studying it deeply myself, which is what I abhor in others. Interesting...

5) HOW OFTEN I LECTURE PEOPLE ON GETTING OUTSIDE THE CHURCH WALLS
IN ORDER TO BE WITH PEOPLE = this is one of the things I'm known for going off on
HOW OFTEN I AM OUTSIDE THE WALLS = actually this I do alot, however, if you ask
me how many good friendships I have built with people outside the church, then that
would be another story

Hopefully, you get the point. My heart has not always been pure in my questioning. I think that my mind of questioning and thought is a gift and a curse. I think everyone has a gift, and that gift always has a dark side and a light side (like the force!). A person who is a strong leader, might also have the potential to be a dictator. A very loving person could also be tempted to affirm and empower people in negative ways and enable them to make bad decisions.
I believe that I have challenged people to think outside boxes in a good way (as people have often thanked me for challenging their thought-processes). But I also know that I have ticked people off and shook them with my questions. I don't want to do that. Being shaken, challenged, and ticked off every once in a while is good and can lead to stronger and deeper faith in Christ. However, as myself, Lee Krempel, what is my heart and motivation when I speak? To inspire thought and shaking to bring good change? Or is it to anger and incite for the sake of it? Tough stuff.
As for me, I am trying to motivate myself to stop being lazy. In every respect. Paying my bills, exercise, spiritual stuff, and actually doing the things I expect everyone else to do.
Ghandi said "BE the change you want to SEE." Well, I know that I haven't. And I think #1 on my list of things is to start trying to do that.
This POST has not been an apology to anyone for my posts. My posts are there more for me than for you, and I cannot apologize or make excuse for the thoughts that spill out of my brain and heart. However, it was a confession. Thank you to the 3 or 4 people who have had the guts to ask me "why."
As donald miller (the writer of the Epistles "Blue Like Jazz" and the like) says: our faith is more about asking the "why" questions than the "How."

Copernicus and The Earth is Not the Center of the Universe

Okay, this might be a recurring idea in my blog entries. I was thinking about Copernicus. You remember him? He was a priest and an astronomer from the 14 and 1500's. He was the guy who came up with the Heliocentric Theory. In other words, the idea that we as the Earth are NOT the center of the galaxy, rather, the big bright hot thing (the Sun) was the center. He made this hypothesis after research and observation. It was not so much a guess, as much as a really smart guy doing actual scientific research to come to this conclusion. Nowadays, we might all have a good laugh at the fact that this theory was ever challenged (much like that crazy "Round Earth Theory"), but back when Copernicus made this claim, there was a firestorm of controversy from EVERYONE, but especially the church. The church at the time (of which he was a minister, let's not forget) interpreted the scriptures and the role of mankind-based on their perception of the Bible-as being central to everything (including the universe). So, of course, this heliocentric theory was heresy. To be sure, any one of us would have had some difficulty swallowing that we weren't the center of the universe, based on what our experience as mankind had been up until then. What I mean is, you can't REALLY blame people for getting pissed off, ya know? But hindsight is always 20/20, unless of course you're talking about politics inthe 21st century thus far. But I digress.
Oh, and by the way, before all of the really well learned scientists and historians (you'd be surpised folks)...(well, not really) who read my blog go crazy, I realize that it was actually Galileo who took the brunt of the religious condemnation for this theory (and others). He did step it up the next level, but the fact remains that Copernicus popularized and exposed heliocenricity. Plus, for the sake of my point I don't want to juggle two names and centuries, so there!
Anyway, my point. My point is that Copernicus's theory really rocked the boat, needless to say. He was called a heretic despite being a christian (as was Galileo). And it was a serious paradigm shift for everyone, and especially for the church. To the church of the day, they could not reconcile this theory (despite it's logical and scientific merit) with their faith. It was a crisis of faith no doubt, and would have been a serious stumbling block.
Fast forward 500 years and some change. We KNOW the earth is not the center of this solar system. We know it's not the center of this galaxy. We know there are millions of galaxies in the universe. And we know there is no end in sight yet of the universe. Just like we know that the earth is round. All of us in the christian community have learned to accept that. It might have taken a few years, but are all on the same page there. And we're still christians. We have been able to reconcile our faith with those scientific facts. A person who does not believe in the heliocentric theory would be considered a caveman by all, even Falwell.
Here's my question:
Since there's always more things to discover, both spiritually and scientifically. Since I believe that God will continue to give us wisdom and enlightenment through his spirit, just as I believe we will continue to study further into space and our own planet. And since I don't believe that all the great discoveries of our history have ALREADY been made, then here's my question:
What IS or WILL BE our next Copernicus situation? As a human race AND as a church.
Is there something (a theory or an idea) going on right now that we as the church are fighting tooth and nail as being heresy or a damage to our faith? And 300 years from now, will christians then look at us and be like "Cavemen, man. How could you NOT believe that?"
For the sake of an example, lets take the literal 6 days of creation. There is some very good science, logic, and biblical evidence to support the fact that the 6 days of creation are, in fact, NOT literal days. That they are hyperbole, or metaphor, or what have you. Maybe some day I'll do a post just about that. Mind you, I'm not saying God didn't create the universe, I'm discussing the manor in which He did. But for an example, take it. You have Christian who will think you're not saved if you don't believe the literal days, or you're not strong in your faith, or stupid, and so on. They will spout facts that they got on "answers.org" or something, they will try to use the bible to prove it, they will say things like "but the bible says it, and this and that." All those things may be true and passionate (if nothing else), but it doesn't change the fact that there is good strong evidence the other way (discovered by people who are very smart and went to good schools, and in some cases don't have anything at stake in their research).
This post is not an advocation of any view (I have my ideas, but another day), but is a question being posed. The idea of the 6 literal days is ONLY one example of many. But the question is: Is there a modern day heliocentric theory? Is there something that we could be wrong about? Something that we feel is so vital to our faith and salvation that we will fight against anyone or anything (including reason and logic, and sometimes our own consciences) in order to keep it at bay? Something that 100 years from now, our great grandchildren will look back and say "Wow, I can't believe they believed that." Kinda like how we look at the Church during the days of Copernicus and Galileo... But they (our great grandchildren) could still be believers. And still love and trust Jesus. Still be Christians.
Just a thought.

go to this. it's funny.

http://www.youtube.com/player.swf?video_id=vEWLwz6JRNE&l=357&s=B4BC767524043

Balance

I'm going to admit something. I probably have about 75% of things WRONG! As I think about my faith and how it relates in today's postmodern culture. How I relate...am I wrong? Could I be wrong? I think so. Am I going to do anything about it? Maybe, I don't know. About some of it, probably.
I just got done having a conversation over lunch with some pastors on staff at the church I go to. Someone said something about the Academy Awards this year being the "Brokeback Mountain" party. He's probably right. But me, being who I am, mentioned that I had seen the film and thought it was very good. You have to understand me, okay. Controversy and getting things stirred up is like my crack. It's like something I can't help doing. God help me. Anyway...the point is, this opened up a whole discussion about "should a christian see that movie" etc... Not in a "you dirty sinner you're going to hell" sense. But a genuine, "what is the responsibility of a believer in a situation like that" kind of deal. It's a legitimate question.
Anyone who knows me, knows that I am not the most pious person when it comes to the arts. Movies, music, books, etc... I do have some lines though, which I don't want to get into right now. The point is, basically, I watch a lot of movies, and a lot of movies that I watch are on the NO-NO list for good christians. But ya know? I don't care. And before you think I'm bragging, understand that I am not. I am trying to understand the nature of my responsibility. As a leader. As a believer. As a role model. What is my responsibility? I'm trying to come to grips with that.
At what point is a movie's subject matter simply TOO far out there morally for a Christian (even the most liberal of them) to entertain? Where is the line between being a pious puritannical prude (three P's, sweet.), and being truly sincere and discerning?
I don't know the answer to that question. I don't know. One thing I do know is that as a leader, I have a responsibility to live out my faith in front of others. To be discerning about who I say what around and do what around, so as not to cause others to stumble in their faith. But at some point (at least for me) I have to say "ya know what, ultimately YOU are responsible for your actions." God knows my heart, just as he knows yours. I would not go around saying to everyone "I saw Brokeback Mountain and it was a good movie! Go see it!! Now!" But ya know what? If someone "found out" that I saw it (as a leader), and they went and saw it, and then became a homosexual and left the church and lost Jesus and became a democrat (that last part was a joke)...then...ya know? That person is an idiot. Well not so much an idiot, I don't mean that, but ultimately that person is responsible for themselves. Ya know?
I understand that raising children up in this postmodern anything goes society is difficult. It is more difficult to raise a child today then it was 25 or even 10 years ago. Especially if you want that child to have morals. But that's the way it is. Parenting simply has to develop along with society. There's nothing you can do about movies coming out that are offensive to you. There's nothing you can do about 3 year old wearing tube tops with thong diapers hanging out of extra extra extra low rise oshkosh shorts. Nothing you can do about the music of Eminem or System. Nothing except try your best to teach your children to be smart, thoughtful, and discerning. And maybe along the way learn the same things about yourself.
So personally, I don't know what I'm doing. I know people see my heart. I know that people know I love Jesus, and people. I don't think those two things are ever in question. And although there are other important things that come into play in leadership, I am not sure where I am on all those things yet. I just don't know. I am a contradiction. But ultimately what's going to impact someone's life through me is not whether I saw Brokeback Mountain or not, but whether I can be there with them and help them if they are struggling with their own sexuality. It's not gonna be if I listen to secular music or not, it's gonna be if they can count on me to pick up the phone when they feel depressed or suicidal. It's not gonna be whether I like to have a beer everyonce in a while or not, it'll be whether they see me loving people and being with them and showing them Jesus.
In the end, when I'm dead and people stand around and talk about me...I'd rather they recognized me for what matters. I'd rather hear things like "Man, one thing's for sure he sure did love people," rather than, "Man did that guy fight hard against the "gay agenda!""

I'd rather hear "Lee was crazy man! We all always had such a good time together! Remember when...", as oppose to "Man, remember how pious that guy was! He was always so afraid of sinning he never had any fun!"

The ideal comment for me would go something like this: "Man, ya know? Lee wasn't perfect by any stretch of the imagination. (Everyone laughs fondly in recognition of all the many ways they knew this to be true) And he'd be the first to tell you that he wasn't trying to be perfect. (Everyone nods in agreement, "yes") But I'll be damned if I ever knew a man who more simply tried to just Be Jesus to everyone. No matter who. No matter where. No matter how. And beyond that, to Lee, the rest was all negotiable details. (Then everyone sits quiet for a moment, raises their bottles of Corona Extra in memory, and begins to laugh about all the crazy stories.)

And there's that. So I don't know what I'm doing. Except for the basics I mean. I just don't know what it looks like. Part of me knows what the safe thing is to do as far as things like Brokeback Moutain, drinking, cursing (or creative language construction as I like to say) every once in a while, etc... what the good christian leardership thing to do would be. To play it safe. Well, I dont know if I'm ready to be that yet, or if I ever will. I don't know. Maybe I'm not a good leader...in that sense. But I think I'm a pretty good christian, whatever that means. Maybe I'm not. I don't know. I dont know...
But until then, I'll go out have 2 beers, then go to the movies to see Brokeback Mountain again, and afterwards say "Damn that was a good movie!"
Happy Valentine's Day!

"Bubble"

Steven Soderbergh's latest film is fascinating. It is called "Bubble" and you may have heard of it because of it's innovative marketing that is causing waves. It has been released in (very few) theaters, on DVD, and on a pay cable channel on TV all at the same time. I don't feel like writing very much in the way of explaining his reasons, but it is interesting. It is a very small film that almost no one outside of a major metropolitan area would EVER see on the big screen, so in an attempt to get maximum coverage for his film, he chose to release it this way. I bought it on DVD last night and watched it. Fascinating film. It was shot on HD video, and employs non-professional actors. I'm talking literally, Steven cast the film with locals that he found where he was shooting. He used their real houses as sets, real family members as family members, and a real police detective as a police detective in the film. You get the idea. It is obvious that these people are not real actors. But as Roger Ebert put it, it makes us realize how contrived and fake "REAL" acting actually is compared to real life. Not that I'd want to watch NON-ACTORS all the time, but watching Bubble I knew I was watching what it would look like to watch all this unfold in real life. It is a voyeuristic experience. Anyway, it is fascinating and I recommend people go out and rent this film, or buy it.
I know I didn't say much about the film itself (plot and whatnot), but I have got to go out of town for the weekend, and I wanted to post SOMETHING, but I don't have time to flesh it out. Go to http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060126/REVIEWS/60117006/1023 for the review.
peace

Couple of Things...including the Muhammad Cartoon

I am usually a tolerant person. Usually the last one to criticize someone elses beliefs (despite my own), usually understanding of another persons position, etc... But ya know? I'm very angry about the violent protests that Extremists are raging over these Muhammad Cartoons. A couple of things.
First of all: No one would be blinking an eye if those cartoons were depicting Jesus in such an offensive manner (as is done all the time, by the way). Not at all. In fact, many people would be praising it for its boldness and statement. To be sure though, most people are condemning this violence.
Secondly: I understand that most Muslims live in countries where there is not true freedom of expression. And I understand that the cartoon was in bad taste. BUT, in Denmark where this cartoon was published, they have freedom of expression...and THAT IS THE BOTTOM LINE!!! So if you don't like it, don't read it!
Thirdly: I feel very sorry for the many, many peace-loving Muslims around the world who are being fasely represented by these extremists. But the truth is, these people are proving the very point that the cartoon was making! I understand their anger. I would be angry too, but these people think, live, and act in a mob-mentality. Stop being so PRIMITIVE! Violence solves nothing!
FINALLY, and this is more of a plea. Speaking of Non-Violence. This should be a call to all true christians to return to the peaceful-non-violent ways of Jesus and the early church. I thank God that the extremist christians that we have to deal with in this country (for the most part) are political in their ways and not violent. I'm glad that-apart from a few outspoken bad apples- Christians around the world are known for being peaceful, loving, caring, and humble. I'm not talking about christian "nations" mind you. I'm talking about Christians. When was the last time you heard about a Christian violent uprising in Asia, or Israel, or South America? you don't. Well, not anymore. And you know what? Thats the way it should be. It doesn't sound glorious or anything, but since th beginning, we have been that way. Carried off to the lion den, praying, forgiving, preaching, loving the whole way. Not fighting back. Being tortured and persecuted, but "praying for our persecutors" and "loving our enemies" and "turning the other cheek." Of course, the middle ages were quite a big screw up, but they don't represent true christianity. We cannot lose our peacemaking, loving, forgiving, turning the other cheek ways. It is what separates us.
Just a thought and a prayer. By the way, did you know that pretty much everyone in the world and throughout history (except the Middle Ages, but even then, the bad guys did not represent all the true and good christians that lived then) recognizes Jesus as a teacher and practicer of Non-Violence? I mean literally everyone (Except the U.S. Pentecostals and some other Western power Pentecostals) sees that aboutJesus. That he preached and lived NON-VIOLENCE! Boy do we ignore that in the US! We have imbued Jesus with all kinds of righteous warmongering. Righteous...warmongering. Turn...the...other...cheek. Hmm... Oh well, we're Americans, we can make Jesus what we want. If we want him to be a white, conservative, pro-western idealogue...then by-golly that's what he is. But you know what they say, God made us in his image and then we decided to return the favor!

Blog Times

I've just noticed that all my times are off on my blog posts. For instance, the State of the Union post was really written at about 10:30pm, but it says 7pm or something. So ignore that. Not that your life is shattered now because of it. Anyway...
Well I don't feel like going on and on about anything right now, but I have to say that I am in an upheaval. I mean, I am being shaken to my foundations in all kinds of ways. I hope and pray that we all experience this kind of upheaval several times throughout our lives. It is confusing, challenging, disturbing, exciting, scary, but I'll be "gosh-darned" if I don't feel so alive right now. Alive and challenging the system. Of everything. The system of my thought-process, my self-indulgence, my religion, my everything! Man, I'm alive. Of course, someone about an hour ago told me, "Hey you look tired!" So apparently I don't LOOK so alive. But that is probably for two reasons. 1) i have small "slits" for eyes. kids use to ask if I was part chinese when I was in middle school. what? and 2) most of these conflicts are very, very internal. trust me, I am very alive on the inside.
I challenge all my legions of blog-fans to question. Question your life. Begin in 10 minutes. What are you doing? Why are you doing it? Are you living your life JUST for you? What are you contributing to making the world a little better? What are you contributing to make it a little worse? At the end of the day, will the fabric of the universe desribe you using the word "love" or "indifference"?
I have a quote from a book I am reading that I thought was interesting:
"When I FED the hungry, they call me a saint. When I ask WHY people are hungry,
they call me a communist." - Dom Helder Camara